the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
