I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
