Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
