from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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