Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
