After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
