I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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