Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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