it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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