...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
