I wish i was in the wii world.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
