She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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