How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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