are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
