Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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