I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize