I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
