meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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