He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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