You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize