Don't you send me to vm
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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