oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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