I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Randomize