Sacagawea was the original milf.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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