The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
