for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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