dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
