Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just blew my weed a kiss
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
