dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
40s are totally the cure
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
