my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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