Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
