yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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