yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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