Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
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