It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
