Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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