I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
