This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
