when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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