shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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