id be glad to
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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