We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
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