we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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