I love black thongs
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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