You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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