he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
