Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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