Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You ate ashes out of my bong
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