whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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