so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
His hands were made for my vagina.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize