Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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